I am easily side tracked and distracted. Life throws me curve balls, which you think I would have learned to catch by now, and things that matter to me get put to the wayside. I try to make sure everyone around me is okay, and don't focus on myself. Lately, I have been keeping a pen and paper journal and just writing. About my path, my life, what it means to be Witch.

There is a lot that goes into being a Witch. I bet most people don't consider it, but it's actually harder than when I was a Christian. I don't have a book to go to to tell me how to live my life and path, to tell me right from wrong. At first, when I first began this journey, that was so daunting. The level of accountability is unreal! You know, I really enjoyed reading my Bible and studying those words and gleaning their wisdom- seriously, I was HUGE into Bible study. Truth is, I'm HUGE into Study on a general level. I love to read about everything- world religions and philosophies are a favorite. I like to know what others think and how they view the world, I like to have first hand information about what people believe, not just what people in other religions and areas "think" they believe. So, what's a Witch to do? A book loving Witch- well she writes her own!

A Book of Shadows is a sacred text, sacred to the Witch who writes it, who breathes life into by creating it. Each page is a testament to her/his journey, something they have learned along the way, a part of that knowledge that they want to keep with them. As I learn and observe my Book of Shadows grows, it grows with me. The Bible never did that, it was already there and it was up to me to grow to it, live up to it- my Book of Shadows- that's something different. My Book of Shadows is for the most part handwritten- the exception to that rule is Ritual- those are long and I type them out and put them in. I have considered re-doing how my ritual section is but haven't actually changed it.

I made my Book of Shadows out of a post bound scrapbook. I wrapped it in crushed velvet, attached a silk Maple Leaf and Silver Painted Wooden Owl to the cover. And I use gold parchment paper for it. It is beautiful to look at and a joy to add to. There isn't as much in it as I would like, often times adding to it is one of those things that gets put to the wayside, but it is becoming quite the reference book. I must admit that it is rather exciting to be able to go to my own Book of Shadows for information instead of looking it up on-line. I am growing, so my book is growing. Although, I may be growing faster than my Book.

Have you ever thought about what it is that makes your Path a journey? What it is that makes you a witch? What if you couldn't cast spells, would you still be a witch? What are the things you do, say, or think that make you a Witch?

I've been thinking about this, and I think of the ways my life has changed since embracing Wicca and claiming it for myself. For me I am a Witch because......

* I try to see the good in people, even when it is hard to see, I strive to always see the Divine within them
* I try to not let my own hurts and pains color the ways I can be of service to those around me.
* Yin Yoga- oh dearest Raush, I can never thank you enough for introducing me to this practice and the focus on my breath, the way it can quiet the noise of the world, melt away the stress of the day, and fuel me with the strength to face another challenge
* Time at my altar- Ray Boltz would probably have a fit, but he has this song called That's What this Altar is For, and it was a favorite of mine when I was younger, but I still draw comfort from the concept- my altar is where I cast away my burdens and surrender them to something Higher and Greater than myself- prayer is not something exclusively for Christians.
* Meditation- A daily practice,spending time every day dwelling on how I want my life to be, sometimes seeing the pathways to make it so, breaking down barriers and eliminating fear, very often crosses over with Altar time.
* A love of nature and trees, the beautiful Willow in my back yard (perk to the new house!)- although this love doesn't translate into skill, I cannot grow herbs, I am adept at killing flowers- I am not a Green Witch folks- I acknowledge and accept that, however much I continue to try and work on it.

Ok, I have rambled on long enough- until next time- whenever that is!

Wynter Willow

Jumpy Mind

I don't know what else to call it. My mind is constantly going from one place to another. It will look like I am not accomplishing anything and then BOOM a flurry of completions all at once. The problem with this is that when life throws me a curve ball MANY projects get out to the side at once and a lot suffers, and I don't always remember what it was I had going on, then months later I remember something and pick it back up ..... this is s character flaw, I am aware, and as bad as it sounds it isn't something I am working to correct. After years of trying to I have determined that this is a part of me and it is a part of how I see and interact with the world around me.

I try to stay connected to all parts of me, I open up one part to the outside world and close off another, this isn't a bad thing, it protects me. It allows me to share of myself and protect myself at the same time. As I learn and study and grow, something that seemed new and exciting may become more intimate in nature, more personal, and so I bring it back unto myself and explore something new that I want to share with others.

My life is in constant flux, and what I am realizing is that this is true for most people. We change and grow and make mistakes. I have made my fair share of doozies in the last 32 1\2 years, I have trusted the wrong people, given of my body too easily, loved people who proved to be unworthy of such devotion..... but it has all brought me here. It has all made me the with and the woman that I am today: beautifully flawed, strong, kind, compassionate, passionate, determined and stubborn as all hell.

Will I get back to the 44 days of Witchery? Will I jump in on the Pagan Blog Project? Are more Zentangles coming? More from Circle of Stones? Yep, and so much more and Goddess knows in what order. But stick with me, because I'm anything but boring and you never know what is coming next.

In light and love,

Wynter

Seeking Avalon

Good morning everyone! Well, that sounds arrogant, for all I know "everyone" is no one, but that's okay. 

I'm journeying along my path, and for the last several years I have changed in so many ways. Maybe I haven't changed, maybe it is that in the last 3 years I have finally allowed myself to be who I have always supposed to be- Me. 

Two years ago I began studying with The Sacred Mists, and I have met some of the most amazing women there and forged friendships that I truly see lasting for the entirety of my lifetime. As part of this training I have done several Deity Studies and a particular set of these set me down a path that I keep going back to and can't shake the call of..... the path to Avalon. I was learning about Blodeuwedd, actually I think I was looking for which deity to study and came across it, and there was a listing of the Goddesses of Avalon. It started simply enough, I thought how convenient there are five of them and I can do my next series of studies on these 5 Goddesses and make my life easier..... I didn't anticipate that from that moment, my life was already changing and I was being called to seek Avalon. 

As I learned  about the Goddesses as I learned their myths and vital statistics and tried to connect with them the sacredness of the endeavor became apparent. I wasn't able to connect with each, and I connected most strongly with Arianrhod, in a beautiful and profoundly altering way. But each study brought me back to learning of Avalon and wanting to learn more, and discovering things about myself, and that which I was unwilling to learn about myself. 

I have begun reading 2 different books, one as a self study and it is called Avalon Within: A Sacred Journey of Myth, Mysteries, and Inner Wisdom. It is fascinating from the beginning, talking of the Fruit of Wisdom the Five Seeds of Wisdom the Avalonian Cycle of Healing and the Sacred Landscape of Avalon. 

The Second book I have started is also a self-study book but I am reading and working through this book with a small group of women who I am on a path to get to know. It is called Circle of Stones: A Woman's Journey to Herself. From what I can tell it is about reclaiming your power and healing the hurts within so that you can ultimately aid others in doing the same and embrace the sacredness of being woman. I've read the preface, introduction and first chapter and I'm going to make myself slow down and think about this. The chapters or sections rather end with a probing question, and since the Preface is the first section to do this, I'm going to answer it as a "in the beginning I thought this" type thing, so I can track and see where my train of thought goes on this journey. 

"How might your life have been different if there had been a place for you, a place for you to go to be with your mother, with your sisters and aunts, with your grandmothers, and the great and great-great-grandmothers, a place of women to go, to be, to return to, as woman? How would your life be different?" -Judith Duerk, Circle of Stones

After reading the Preface to the novel this question placed here almost seems rhetorical, like we're supposed to think on it but not really have an answer yet. The rest of the book will be digging deeply into many facets of this question. But what if I could have spent time sitting and talking with the strong women around me. I was able to observe strong women, I was able to enjoy different moments with them and hear their stories. But my family has always been so far spread out, my two sisters who are also Wiccan have never lived near me, they living with their mom and me with mine. My mother is a strong woman but she was always trying to survive and provide. From her I learned about hard work and the importance of inner strength, but not really how to cultivate it. She is much stronger than I am,  I don't know how she did it. That might be it, if there had been this place where we could have truly come together and shared and spoke, I think I would be more confident than I am, that confidence would have been a given and not something that has been hard fought and sought after. I think I would have known from the earliest of days my value and worth and there are circumstances that I never would have found myself in. Is it possible that if this place with my mother and sisters and Aunts and the wiser women of my grandmother and great grandmother would have caused the ripple effect that I wouldn't have the children I have now, because I never would have settled for their fathers? A place to glean the wisdom of those who love me and want the very best for me.... yes, that would have changed my life, it still would change my life..... to be surrounded by strength and beauty, freely shared and wisdom freely passed on..... 

I'm really excited to be reading this book.... I'll be back to let you in on the answers to other questions as well. 

Many Blessings,

Wynter

Zentangle Challenge #6

Here it is Challenge #6!!! I don't think I've ever talked about being a Past Lives Divinator, but it is something that I really do enjoy. A big part of what I do is reading Natal Charts in order to see the karmic impacts of the past on your present life. Being so deeply involved in the study of the Signs and Planets I thought that incorporating their symbols into Zentangle would be a lot of fun! So this one I used the symbol for Aries as my String to break up my tile. Aries is a Fire sign so I used Red and Orange to do the tangle inside of the symbol to let it contrast with the black.  The Week 6 challenge was to use the IXORUS pattern in the tangle and that is present too! I also played around with vanishing vantage points with a couple of the patterns, overall I think the look is pretty cool. Enjoy!!

Have a wonderful week, I probably won't be around for a couple of days, Atlanta is expecting a serious ice storm and I will leave for work this evening and probably not be home until Thursday. Yay for the paycheck, but I'm really going to miss my children. Don't worry, I'm bringing some Tangling supplies and will be able to pass down time hours with something creative and beautiful. 

Blessed Be,

Wynter

Zentangle Challenge #5

The challenge here was to use Orbs as part of the Tangle. It was harder than it seemed, but I think the results are pretty good.

What do you think?

Blessed Be,

Wynter

Zentangle Challenge #4

Well the fourth challenge from The Diva (button over there on the right sidebar) was to use a Star or incorporate a Star in the creation of the Zentangle. This one is special for a couple of reasons. 1 it is the first time I used the Printemps pattern, I've done spirals before, but these ones actually cut off and overlap. Also, I modified the cross stitch and made the X's little stick stars, guess they look like an asterix a little. I left the Star outline plain so it could pop out of the design and not be lost. And looking at this picture as I type this I realize I didn't initial this one, better do that! 

This one is another note card, I have to say I enjoy making them as note cards, just need the right people to write to, you know the ones who don't throw cards away.... I'm thinking my sisters in the Mists will make great candidates....

Well, I really should do some kind of post for the 44 Days of Witchery and I want to jump into the Pagan Blog Challenge this year, just seem to get distracted easily, lol. 

More later,

Wynter

Zentangle Challenge #3

Well, I'm not going to call them Weekly Challenges because, well I'm just not I might do one a day, I might skip a week or two, who knows how many I'll actually do. but I will link to them and talk about them.

Challenge #3 (found here) is called Eyes Wide Shut, and the challenge is to draw the string with your eyes closed! Mine was a two loop thing that made two tiny sections and two really big sections, I debated putting dots in the stripes along the outside and that served as fill but decided not to. This was my first working with Cadent pattern, and I didn't know how to do it with the "cut off" look, so I did them all solid then filled in with the lines. I also varied Cadent by making a center circle and connecting to each of the four corners from the center circle. The big thing is this made me nauseous spinning the paper and gave me a little bit of a headache.... oh well, live and learn right? This is not my favorite Tangle, the one I did for the 2nd challenge actually is, but notice the Chainlea? I even attempted slight shading.... something I haven't done much of and should practice.... thinking Chainlea and Dragonair would be so beautiful together.... will experiment and see. 

Well, that's it for now,

Many Blessings,

Wynter